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02/06/2018

FIVE WAYS TO DEAL WITH SELF-DOUBT

We live in a world full of constant pressures.

We often come across the perfect mom, dedicated wife, the amazing body, great career and great relationship.

Honestly, as much as we try not to compare ourselves, we simply can’t.

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We simply can’t help but to pressure ourselves with what we “think” we should be doing.

Self-doubt is something that is hard for us to understand, but that we constantly fall for.
I’ve been a victim of this feeling several times.

As we begin to age, not that 28 or 30 is such an old age, we often get pressured about what we should accomplish by a certain age or time frames.
For the most part we put the pressure on ourselves.

Social media has played a huge role into this pressure.

We often come across “perfect people” all over these social platforms.
Which makes us over analyze everything around us.

We obviously can’t just blame social media about this pressure; we are often around actual humans that make us feel this way as well.
From family members, friends and even co-workers.

We become wrapped in an uneasy feeling, constant worry and stress about the future and general unhappiness even though everything is going OK in our life. Ross Dress for less

Whether we want to accept it or not, these feelings are called self-doubt, and it sucks to feel that way.

If I’m being honest, I don’t know what sparked that feeling in me.
Well, maybe I do, I was blessed with a once in a life time opportunity that I feel I’m wasting, but I’m just afraid to get outside of my comfort zone and I know that’s bad.

I have been stuck in a funk for months since last year, but I can honestly say I am learning to get out of it little by little.
I know there are a lot of you out there that are currently going through the same thing, so I decided to share the five ways I deal with Self-Doubt.

Below I’m sharing my five ways I deal with self-doubt.


Identify the source
This has got to be the hardest thing to identify.
Although there are times where we know exactly what has brought us to feel this way.
Accepting, or pin pointing the source may be the hardest thing.

Journals are so helpful during this process, I know it sounds so much like your teenage years but this is one of the best ways to get your feelings and thoughts out without feeling judged or misunderstood.
Write everything you are feeling or that’s on your mind.

Stop comparing yourself to others
Easiest thing to write, hardest thing to do.
I’ve found myself doing this a lot and I mean a lot.
As a single mom, I feel so pressured to have things done a certain way that I want to be able to fill in the absent parent gap as much as possible.
But sometimes you simply can’t.

I see friends, and people around me married, family, two parent house hold with all types of things accomplished by my age, that is hard for me to not try to compare myself to others.
Honestly comparing yourself to others is really difficult to avoid.

Talking with someone helps you get out of the comparison mode.
Sometimes when other people that love you describe things you have been able to accomplish sounds bad ass, and definitely remind you that it isn’t so bad and you have actually been able to do some pretty cool things.

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Connect with those who lift you up
Even though they’ve heard your drama before!
Which often this is the main reason we get away from our friends. We are afraid to feel judged by our loved ones.

If you know me, I am usually the type to bottle everything up and shut down from everything and everyone.
This has got to be my biggest challenge, but I’ve been getting better.

Reach out to your friends, or that someone that transmits comfort by simply being near you.
Honestly there have been plenty of times where I’ve had crappy days and all I needed to make me feel better was a hug.
Other times all you want is to cry.
Cry without saying anything to anyone.

Trust me we all have that person that can support us in these ways.
Don’t be afraid to reach out.

Forgive yourself
Even though you are at a certain point in your life where you see that everyone has figured out their sh*t, forgive yourself if you are still trying to figure it out.
Yes, I know so much better said than done. I get it. There are times where you can’t find the balance on achieving this but work slowly towards it.

Now there’s a difference between making up excuses all the time. Something that my friends always remind me as well.
You should at least be working your way towards your goals.

Enjoy the small wins!

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 Get Away
My favorite thing to do!
Sometimes all we need is a little get away to get us out of the routine.
It doesn’t have to be anywhere fancy; sometimes we need to get away somewhere where it doesn’t feel as crowded.
I live in a congested city; there are plenty of small towns near me where sometimes I escape to.

Go somewhere where you can hike, relax your mind, or eat an ice cream from a local ice cream shop.
Take your journal with you, where you can jot down your thoughts.
Take photos.
Go to the restroom alone for 10 minutes even if you don’t have to go.
Do something that makes you feel away from your overwhelming thoughts.

What are some ways you deal with self-doubt?

 

 

 

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